The Journey of Caregiving: A Personal Reflection

For a year and a half, I had the privilege of caring for both of my parents. Being a caregiver is not just about meeting basic needs; it’s about dedicating yourself to the well-being of someone who relies on you completely. My parents’ care became my number one priority, and while the experience was often challenging, it was also deeply rewarding. It gave me the chance to give back to the people who had once cared for me.

Caregiving requires more than just physical care—it requires love, empathy, patience, and dedication. Fortunately, these qualities were not difficult for me to offer, as they were my parents. I made it my mission to ensure their health and medical needs were closely monitored. My parents trusted me, and I made sure I lived up to that trust by providing the best care possible.

My father had poor circulation in his legs, and my mother was living with dementia, which progressed over time. Managing their medical and personal needs became my responsibility, encompassing everything necessary to support their well-being. I was constantly mindful that my siblings and other family members had entrusted me with their care.

Maintaining open communication with my family was crucial. We kept a shared calendar to track doctor’s appointments and other important events. I also had to remain vigilant, especially with my mom’s condition. She experienced “sundowners,” a phenomenon where dementia causes confusion and agitation during the evening hours. There were moments when she would grab her purse and head outside, convinced she was going home. These were difficult, but I remained alert to ensure her safety.

In addition to medical care, caregiving included a wide variety of household responsibilities. I prepared three meals a day, cleaned the house, did laundry, and bought groceries. Medication management was a key part of my duties as well. I maintained a seven-day pillbox, clearly labeled for each parent, and ensured that all medications were stored securely.

I also made sure my parents received proper hygiene care, including oral hygiene, bathing, and skin care. Both of them developed pressure ulcers, and with the help of the nurses, I learned how to change bandages and turn them at the right times to prevent further issues. Transportation became another responsibility—taking them to doctor appointments, the grocery store, or even for a joy ride, just to give them a change of scenery.

Caring for both parents took a physical and emotional toll on me. Despite my best efforts, I struggled with lack of sleep and overwhelming stress. I had to learn how to ask for help and accept that I couldn’t do everything on my own. Thankfully, I had emotional support from the nurses who assisted with my parents’ care and spiritual support from my church community.

In the end, my father was transferred to a nursing facility the day before he passed away, to ensure he wouldn’t die at home, as my mother’s dementia made it challenging for her to fully understand the situation. When he passed, I was there with my sibling on a three-way call, processing the loss together. Later, when my mother passed, I was honored to be the one to care for her in her final moments, ushering her into the presence of God.

Being a caregiver is not easy, but it is a journey filled with love, learning, and growth. I am grateful for the opportunity to have given back to my parents in their time of need. The experience taught me the value of patience, resilience, and the importance of asking for help when needed. Though it was one of the most challenging times of my life, it was also one of the most meaningful.